Q: Dear Love Jays,
When my girlfriend and I first got together she pampered me. She gave me massages, made dinner, cleaned my place, did laundry just to name a few. 6 months down the line the pampering has stopped. Is that a sign she is no longer interested in me?
A: Dear I Miss the Pampered Life:
Choo Chooooo!! Looks like the honeymoon train has reached its destination!
[Insert voice on loudspeaker] “Please grab all of your belongings and exit the train. Upon exiting the train, you will officially begin your relationship. Anticipate many bumps, hills, roundabouts, storms and emotional boiling points along the way!”
The ceasing of the pampered life does not mean she has lost interest. She just may feel “all that extra stuff” is no longer needed or warranted. I am not encouraging this behavior, but it may be sign of an occurring shift in your relationship. Next time the two of you are spending quality time together, jokingly bring it up in conversation. See how she responds. If it’s negative or dismissive, uh-oh! If she jokes back, you’re in the clear.
When was the last time you pampered her? Good deeds don’t go unnoticed. Try paying her some extra attention by “pampering” her. Even if you don’t get it return, a happy woman makes for a happy relationship!
Sincerely,
Mr. J
A: Dear Welcome to the Real World,
She still likes you. Breathe. Yes, I know you were in relationship bliss for those six months. Who wouldn’t be with a woman that works overtime to spoil you. Well I hope you enjoyed it buddy, because that ship has sailed! The honeymoon is officially over and now you actually have to work for what you want.
I trust you are familiar with the term “You scratch my back and I’ll scratch yours”? That is exactly what you need to do if you are looking for a little extra TLC.
If you are seriously concerned about the relationship because she has pulled away emotionally as well stopped pampering you then you need to have a conversation about it. Given the timeline I seriously doubt that is the case.
Other than that actions speak louder than words. So light some candles, make some dinner, warm up the massage oil and show her how it is done!
Love,
Miss J
© LoveJays 2012