I’d like to date outside of my race, but I feel I’d be uncomfortable going to somewhere like a country bar. Any suggestions?
Dear A Tad Uncomfortable,
Dating outside of your race may be difficult or uncomfortable…if you allow for it. This past weekend, we featured an interracial couple on our radio show and asked if they had experienced any negativity for dating outside of their race. Their answer? Once they passed the threshold of real love, it wasn’t even a thing considered.
“For those people who feel a lot of pressure, it’s because they are insecure and they are looking for reasons to why this might not work in the future.” -MC Prototype
Some cultures are much more accepting of dating outside of race, while others have very strong opinions against it. I’m all for embracing our culture and respecting family beliefs and values, but love is love; we all have different paths toward finding it and the person(s) made right for us could very well be a different color.
Getting out of your comfort zone isn’t easy; it requires us to open our minds and embrace vulnerability. However, remaining in a safe space only allows for minimal growth and countless of missed opportunities. Open yourself to the possibilities of something different and do it with a smile! If it makes you feel at ease, I went to a country bar a few times in college and enjoyed myself each and every time; I even learned how to line dance…kind of.
Love,
Mr. J
A:Dear Ready to Try Something New,
It is common to want to experience something new and unfamiliar in the dating world and otherwise. I think instead of aiming to date outside of your race it may be better to be open to dating outside of your race. No need to go fishing. You want something to happen organically.
If you are uncomfortable going to a “country bar”, then it makes no sense to go looking for someone to date there. If you are looking to get out of your comfort zone completely, that’s okay. But realize you more than likely will be returning to more “country bars” in the future.
In my opinion, the same rules still apply. You want to find someone with whom you are compatible and share similar interest with. People of all races are into all types of thing. I am sure there are plenty of people outside of your race at a number of places you would normally go. Love of all colors can happen anywhere, not just at places that you know will have a plethora of a particular race. Stay true to you. Good Luck!
Just 3 weeks after our appearance on Forkin’ Amazing, we were offered to host our very own show on TradioV LA! Click on the picture above or follow this link to view our pilot show.
Our show will air live on Saturdays at 11:00 a.m. PST and we would love to get our community of readers involved in the show!
Special thanks to Will (MC Prototype) and Janine for being our featured guests. Show your support and download his latest album, Chasing Dreams on iTunes or at www.mcprototype.com.
I was scanning my closet with the biggest smile on my face.
“What color should I wear?”
“I’ll were this one…never mind. I’ll keep it simple and wear this shirt.”
“Which tie looks best?
After 5-10 minutes of back-and-forth debate with my mother, I had finally picked out the outfit I would wear on my first day to work.
August 19, 2011.
It was a Friday, weather was great; I was scheduled to work a half-day. My nerves were all over the place, yet I was excited to embark on this new journey of adulthood and success. A few weeks had passed and I was slowly gaining a better understanding of my job responsibilities, rules to follow, and all that other “9-5” business stuff.
December 3, 2011.
I passed my 90-day review with flying colors and saved enough money to move out of my parent’s house into my very first place! Just seven months removed from college, I was working as an Admissions Counselor at a top-tier, highly selective university and was living on my own. I was officially a “grown up”.
My friends and family were proud of my accomplishments and I was able to do just about anything I wanted, within reason. If I wanted to spend $100 on a date, I didn’t think twice about it. Christmas? I couldn’t wait to spoil my family!
April 3, 2012.
I received an email from a college friend who was looking to see if I would be interested in starting a business with him. I wasn’t much of a business guy (didn’t take one business course in college), yet I wanted to hear more about the opportunity. For the next couple months, we scheduled a few meetings and exchanged several emails and phone calls.
As more and more time passed, I was starting to consider leaving my job and pursing this full-time. I was met with some backlash from friends and family when I ran this idea by them, but I brushed it off and came to a decision I felt was best.
June 24, 2012.
I walked into my supervisor’s office and handed her my notice. Easily one of the hardest decisions I have made. It caught her by surprise and she was visibly disappointed and bummed. We spoke for a few minutes and I headed back to my desk.
Relieved? Eager? Excited? Scared? Probably a mixture of all these plus a few more. I spent the next couple of weeks tying up any loose ends and packed up my apartment.
July 13, 2012.
My last day. It finally hit me. Was I really walking away from a full-time job and my own place to start a business? It’s easier to take risks when you’re young, so I hid my nerves and celebrated with my colleagues before leaving the suite one last time.
Another chapter in life was about to close. Two more chapters were set to begin.
What is the second chapter I speak of? Scroll through to the beginning of the blog and you will discover this was the day Love Jays was born.
July 14, 2012.
I was completely moved out of my apartment and now residing in a large home with 7 other people. Two were my business partners, one was a friend of my business partner, and the other four were entrepreneurs eager to get their businesses off the ground.
What did I just get myself into? Turning back was no longer an option. I was determined to prove everyone who doubted me wrong.
October 12, 2012.
Our mobile application launches in the Apple App Store and we are thrilled. Four months of hard work had finally paid dividend.
It was a breath of fresh air.
We weren’t experiencing too many victories in that four-month span, so it was nice to finally get one under our belt.
November 2, 2012.
A knock at the door. I answer.
“Are you serious? Okay, let me get my business partner.”
We had just been informed the house we were occupying foreclosed and the people at the door were with the new buyers.
Millions of thoughts rushed through my mind. I began to question if I made the right decision. I was warned, but I didn’t listen. Is this what startup life is like? What’s going to happen next? Where are we going to live?
We continued forward and tried to ignore the distractions.
February 8, 2013.
Move out day.
Am I really moving again? Where will I go next? Did I make the wrong decision?
February 15, 2013.
My business partner schedules a meeting to discuss the future of our company.
As I’m driving to the location, I fear the worst.
We meet for an hour and my fears are confirmed. We are completely out of money and it’s time to start pursuing a different path.
Speechless. Confused. Disappointed. Failure.
February 20, 2013.
The last seven months have been quite eventful. I’ve experienced a few highs, quite a few lows; met some great friends and learned more about myself.
Some may argue I failed; I would argue that learning valuable life lessons are in direct opposition of failure.
I’m not quite sure what I’ll do next, but there is one thing I am certain about…
Miss J’s love and support.
It’s a blessing to have someone who is there to celebrate your highs and provide comfort when you’re feeling low. Miss J could have easily discouraged me from leaving my job as an Admissions Counselor to pursue the very unstable entrepreneurial lifestyle, yet she stood firm in my corner and encouraged my leap of faith. When it didn’t turn out the way we expected and everything around me seemed to be crumbling down, my relationship with Miss J continued to grow stronger.
Offering support to a friend or loved one during a time of transition isn’t always easy; it requires a selfless spirit and an abundance of love. But as someone who is experiencing such a transition, I can assure you it’s an act appreciated beyond words.
We have all been assigned a different mission in life. Some have been called to lead great businesses or practice medicine; others have been called to teach, to write, to dance, to sing or to serve. Though are journeys in life may look wildly different, we are united in our call to love and support each other.
Thank you to everyone for your continued love and support.
This past Monday, we had the privilege of guest starring on Forkin’ Amazing’s Valentine’s Day edition internet radio show. Click the picture above or follow this link to view the episode.
We talk a bit in the beginning, but the real interview starts at 10:27. Feel free to fast forward through the commercials.
Share your thoughts with us!
Love,
J&J
P.S. If you are a LA FOODIE, be sure to check out Forkin’ Amazing every Monday at 5:00 p.m. at TradioV.com/LA.
It’s important to realize this holiday is not about the gifts you receive nor the meals you may consume, it’s all about love! Go out of your way this year to show your love for your partner, your friends or a complete stranger. February 14 may be the only day on the calendar dedicated to love; however, it’s our responsibility to spread love each day of the year.
Committed or single – put a smile on your face and share friendly hugs to whomever you see fit!
Miss J is feeling under the weather today (wish her well), so in lieu of our typical Tuesday posts, we wanted to share with you a video we made a few days ago addressing our differences in cleanliness!
If you have not subscribed to our YouTube channel, be sure to follow the link. We will be releasing more videos in an attempt to connect further with all of our readers!
